🔧 MergeGuardian 9000: I Built an AI Code Reviewer With a 0% Approval Rate

This is a submission for the DEV April Fools Challenge




What I Built


I've opened hundreds of pull requests in my career. Fixed typos. Refactored auth flows. Centered divs. And every single time, some reviewer finds a reason to block the merge. Not because the code is bad. Because the vibes are off.

By PR #200, I realized the problem...